Friday, July 7, 2023

Please Burn Your Acoustic Guitar By JPR

And spare the world being tormented by your ear rape manifestos of relationships you never truly had.

Allow people to drink their coffee in peace.

Nobody ever rocked the house strumming peacefully away.

Sex, drugs & rock n roll songs about Satan; the hippies can all drown in all that peace and love bullshit.

The Renaissance Faire is about as happening as the bingo hall, and even those tossers would tell you to shut the fuck up.

Nobody needs to share their feelings, much like a bathroom mirror doesn't make you a model; it just shows your desperation for attention.

And don't forget to check that background and always make sure to flush.

Because shit stinks, as so does folk music and open mics.

Let's start a fire and burn it all to the ground.

Peace, love, and understanding is the other fucking way.

Welcome to the un-sunny side of the street.

Y’all keep those bullshit and butterflies to yourself, and sincerely,

Fuck off!

JPR holds the bronze medal in competitive couch surfing and lives in a remote basement in an abandoned church somewhere in Romania.

He has been published in The Occultism Quarterly, Screw Magazine, Barely Legal, Tweekers Unhealthy Living Journal,The New Yorker, Better Homes And Gardens, Field And Stream, & The Dope Fiend Daily.

He paused his video game to write this bio.

You're welcome!